What does it say about our generation that every time there is a “reimagining” of a classic character they are always sloven frat boys that are too smart for their own good. How is that cool? You know what’s cool? Keeping your room clean. That’s cool.
Take Chris Pine’s Captain Kirk in J.J. Abrams Star Trek reboot. My childhood is littered with fond memories of seeing the original Star Trek films in theaters and reruns of the old show. Sure Captain Kirk was a bit of rebel but he was dependable and would gladly risk his life for his crew. Then here comes Abrams and his reimagining. The new Kirk is useless. He seems more at home in a bar than in the captain’s chair of the Enterprise.
The same is true for Guy Ritchie’s reimagining of Sherlock Holmes. Robert Downey Jr. plays the brilliant consulting detective, while Jude Law fills in as the faithful sidekick Dr. Watson. Holmes is dirty. A drunk. Self-centered. Snooty. Violent (Takes out his “companion’s” snub on street brawlers by breaking their jaws and ribs.)
Downey’s Holmes is an emotional slob who spends the entire film whining about the fact that Watson is moving out of the home they share at 221 B Baker Street. The film seems nothing more than a coming out film for the two beloved characters.
They each have a love interest but they’re nothing more than beards for the obviously gay men. I don’t understand why Ritchie didn’t just make them gay. It has been an ongoing joke for years, so why not run with it. The film wasn’t written well enough to convince anyone that they were great friends. Instead they treat the characters like former lovers going through a break.
The film starts with Watson and Holmes last case. Then jumps several months forward and Watson is moving out. Holmes has locked himself in his room for two weeks wallowing in the sorrow of losing his long time companion. Losing is Holmes interpretation of the move. When in all likelihood, Watson is simply moving up the block.
I felt as if the period between the opening and the jump, Holmes must have confessed his love in a drunken stupor and Watson must have accepted. They had one night of passion and Watson woke up the next morning and realized the mistake. Holmes felt there was more but Watson thought it was nothing more than a friendly romp.
I’m spending way too much time on the homosexual undertones. I just wish the film were better at creating a friendship. Watson seemed to only participate in the investigation because he shared Holmes love of investigation, not because he couldn’t stand to leave his friend.
At two hours and fifteen minutes the film was way too long. A good half hour could have been cut. It was slow and the jokes were trite. There wasn’t an original line, plot point or set piece in the entire film.
I have no doubt that the film will make $100 million dollars and that two more films are already in the works. It’s to be expected for a film like this. I am saddened that Robert Downey Jr. wasted his great talent.
I had hoped for something more like Iron Man. A smart action film that utilized all of Downey’s deep reservoir of talent to add something new to the tired Comic Book Adaptation Genre. But this Holmes film does nothing more than set us back two steps in the detective genre and I have no doubt that Arthur Conan Doyle is rolling in his grave because a director who’s trying so desperately to be the great director we all thought he would become has cheapened his life’s work. Sadly this film is more like Swept Away than Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.
Bottom Line: Save your money. Save your time. Read a Sherlock Holmes book or rent one of the many other Holmes adaptations but stay away from this one. It’s not worth the film it was printed on.
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